Tag Archives: love thyself

Post-Op Week 108: Surgery Again…

Posted on August 4, 2015 | 3 comments

If ever there was a week for my insurance company to make money off of me, last week was it.  Of course this week is looking pretty good too since my gallbladder surgery is tomorrow.  Thankfully, it’s only a day surgery so I should be home tomorrow afternoon if all goes well.  My surgeon (another doctor in my bariatric surgeon’s office) seems to think it will be fine.

I had all manner of doctors’ appointments last week, some of which were routine maintenance, and some of which were prep for surgery.

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Posted in big things, challenges, fighting biology, la guerra, NSV's, post-op, post-op life, reflections, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, what's up doc?, WLS

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Accepting the Me that Is

Posted on June 22, 2015 | 3 comments

Epicurus--do not spoil

A childhood friend shared this with me today.  In light of my moving toward acceptance of the body I am currently in, I thought it would be good to post it here for posterity’s sake.

I remember a time when I longed for the body I have, and how I didn’t think I’d ever get what I have now.  Now I’m here and struggling to love what is.

It is not constructive to want what I am not and what I cannot be or have because of my biology.

It’s time to stop fighting the genetic deck that is stacked against me and to accept what is.

It’s time to embrace the me that has become.  It’s time to accept the me that is.

I will love this incarnation of me.  As hard as this is, I will love this me, with all her imperfections, scratches and dents.

I will love the rolls, ripples, varicose veins, wrinkles and the stretch marks.  I will love the curves and bumps, the saggy, the baggy, the bones that jut out, and the tendons I more readily see under my skin.

I will love this version 2.0, and I will accept it as me.

If I don’t love this me, it will be hard for others to love it too.

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Posted in la guerra, post-op life, reflections, self-image, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery

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Post-Op Week 102: Acceptance and Moving Forward

Posted on June 21, 2015 | 4 comments

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It’s been a couple of weeks since I updated anything regarding post-op life, so here is one.

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Posted in challenges, choices, dealing with regain, fighting biology, frustrated fat, goals, head trips, la guerra, oh behave!, post-op, progreso, progress report, reflections, regain, self-image, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, WLS

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Post-Op Week 85: Rethinking Goals and a Recipe

Posted on February 22, 2015 | 2 comments

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Nearly as fast as I put on the weight I gained over the holidays, I lost it.  Then regained it.  Then lost it again.  This rollercoaster ride my body’s taking me on is frustrating at most, but is what I suppose maintenance is at best.  What I need to grapple with is this:  am I ready to be here?

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Posted in challenges, cooking, fighting biology, frustrated fat, goals, la guerra, oh behave!, planning, post-op, post-op life, progreso, progress report, recipes, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, what's up doc?

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My Body, My House

Posted on January 26, 2015 | Leave a comment

I did some maintenance on my house tonight.  Went back to the gym and rode the bike on a hills program for 45 minutes and then (likely to the chagrin of my ortho guy) did light leg weights and some upper body.  It felt good.

I think from now on, I will try to remember that my body is the house I grew up in.  I need to take better care of it since it’s the house I’m going to live in the rest of my life.

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Posted in exercise, head trips, la guerra, little things, oh behave!, post-op, reflections, self-image, the little things, vsg

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Post-Op Week 64 Progress Report: New Workouts

Posted on September 28, 2014 | Leave a comment

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Not surprised by the slight gain this week–it is nearly that time of the month again, and this is par for the course for me and my body.

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Posted in exercise, goals, habits, la guerra, NSV's, oh behave!, post-op, progreso, success, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!

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Post-Op Week 62 Progress Report: Swimming Without Floaties

Posted on September 14, 2014 | Leave a comment

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Completely surprised by this week’s progress.  I don’t know what could have been the cause, because there were so many things I was changing at once (bad scientist, changing more than one variable at a time!).  Whatever the reason, I hope this means I’m finally off the plateau I seem to have been on for the past 3 months.

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Posted in big things, celebrations, challenges, exercise, goals, habits, la guerra, oh behave!, post-op, progreso, reflections, self-image, support, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, therapy, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!

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Post-Op Week 54 Progress Report: Milestones and Digging Deep

Posted on July 20, 2014 | Leave a comment

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This week’s progress was a surprise, as I was on the road again this week at a conference in Houston.  Travel tends to wreak havoc on my routine, and I sometimes don’t make the best choices with regard to eating and exercise despite plans to do so.

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Posted in big things, celebrations, challenges, exercise, goals, la guerra, oh behave!, post-op, progreso, reflections, self-image, success, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!

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Post-Op Week 47 Progress Report: In Which I Bravely Uncover My Body’s Imperfections

Posted on June 1, 2014 | 5 comments

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This week’s progress is following the pattern that I have come to recognize at this time of my cycle:  slight gain before my period, followed by a slightly larger loss.  So I’m hopeful that next week will show a loss on the scale.  I knew I was a little puffy this morning when I got up and my feet felt stiff and turgid and my rings were a bit more snug.  That’s the big indicator that I’m retaining water, aside from feeling bloated and having tender breasts.  That’ll come later in the week, I’m sure.  UGH.

My eating wasn’t horrible this week but it wasn’t the best either.  Gotta get my eating priorities in order and aim for goal.  So glad this is the last week of school so I can spend more time focusing on getting to where I eventually want my weight to be.  I also need to set smaller goals for myself with rewards–I haven’t done this in a while.  I am 5 weeks away from my 1-year mark, and I’m not close to where I want to be by the time I see my doctor again–still 9 pounds away from doc’s goal, but 19 from where I want to be by July 10, when I see him for my 1-year appointment.

DISCLAIMER:  Under the cut, you’re going to encounter what a body that has lost nearly 170 pounds (nearly 210 from its heaviest weight) really looks like.  If you’re post-op, then you have likely encountered the same sights.  If you’re pre-op, just consider the photos you’ll see prep for what lies ahead for you, especially if you have over 100 pounds to lose.  And if you’re drinking the Haterade because you see fat shaming as sport, just move along.  I don’t have time to trifle with people of your ilk.  You see, one of the unspoken benefits of having lost all this weight is that the degree to which I care what others think is quite low.  In fact:

lookatallthefucksigiveabout what you think about how I look.  I don’t suffer any fools.  SN:  I love this meme…

Now that I’ve got that out of the way, let me proceed with the rest of the post after the jump.

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Posted in challenges, exercise, frustrated fat, goals, la guerra, post-op, progreso, reflections, self-image, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery

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Post-Op Week 46 Progress Report: Mental and Physical Aches and Pains

Posted on May 25, 2014 | Leave a comment

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This week’s progress is good. With the adjustment in my calorie intake (I’m at 1100-1200 daily now), I’m still losing.  Slowly, but still losing.  It’s not a sprint, but a marathon, right?  I don’t care how long it takes to get there as long as I get there.

The past few weeks have been a real mental fight for me as behavioral fatigue is setting in big time.

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Posted in challenges, goals, habits, la guerra, NSV's, oh behave!, post-op, progreso, reflections, success, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!

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