This post is going to be fairly brief, as things around these parts are crazy busy these days. But the crazy busy is in a good way. So I’ll do a quick drive-by update with bullet points, because it’s about all I have time for right now.
- Gallbladder surgery went well. My recovery was smooth and uneventful. I did learn at my follow-up appointment that my gallbladder had stopped ejecting bile properly, and as a result, cholesterol and bile had accumulated on the inside walls of the sac. As my surgeon said, “It was definitely time for it to come out.” So it’s good that I had the surgery when I did.
- I also learned that I no longer have a fatty liver. When I had my gallbladder removed, my surgeon did a liver biopsy, as the lab work I had done on my trip to the ER in June gave him cause to want to poke around there. The path report revealed that I no longer had evidence of fatty liver disease. This is huge, given that on the day of my sleeve surgery a little over 2 years ago, my liver had 60% fatty infiltration. My surgeon was thrilled to learn that my fatty liver had been resolved by my WLS.
- Looks like I’ll be having more surgery this year. UGH. My right knee has decided it’s had enough of being patched together with a neoprene brace. I’m looking at getting it scoped over Christmas so that I can have 2 weeks off my feet, and more importantly, 2 weeks with someone around who can help me! And depending on what happens with my shoulder, there may be yet another surgery in the cards for me this year. My left shoulder has decided it’s had enough and can’t even. So I will be heading BACK to the ortho to find out what the hell is going on with my shoulder once I get back from being out of town this week.
- Regain is real, y’all. So for those of you who are early on in the process of having WLS, or who have just had it, please don’t delude yourselves into thinking, “I’m going to lose this weight FOREVER!!!!” or say stuff like “That’s ______ pounds gone FOREVER!!!!” Or at the very least, don’t say those things without realizing that while yes, losing the weight as a result of surgical intervention is fast and seemingly easy, keeping it off is much, much more difficult. I’ll be real with y’all–I’ve gained back about 35 pounds this past year (scary, huh?). I know exactly why and how, and I’ve decided to go back to a devil I know to lose it. I’ll be starting Weight Watchers online next week in an attempt to get back down to the weight I was at this time last year. I felt good, I looked good, I slept better, and I moved around better. I need the structure that the WW program provides because clearly I can’t provide it for myself right now. Also? All I have ever tried to do in my life is lose weight. I’ve never known how to maintain it. Losing weight is something I am good at; maintenance is not. I’m scared I’ll never learn how to maintain a weight I can live with. So in the meantime, I’ll be back to weight loss mode so that I can at least have a shot at feeling good about how I look and feel again.
Well, that’s all I’ve got time for…work and meal prep are calling.
Posted in challenges, dealing with regain, frustrated fat, la guerra, planning, post-op, post-op life, reflections, self-care, self-image
Tagged behavioral fatigue, being authentic, being real, benefits of wls, big things, challenges, changes, cooking, dealing with regain, fighting biology, fighting the fat girl, gallbladder removal, knee issues, la guerra, maintenance, moar surgery!, NSV's, oh behave!, orthopedic issues, post-op, post-op life, reflections, regain, self-care, self-image, shit is hard, surgery, the sleeve, the struggle is real, VSG, vsg realness, weight loss surgery, weight watchers, what's up doc?, WLS
…feels like an oncoming train these days.
So what do I do? I cook, I eat, and I plod on.
Here’s a sampling of what I cooked last week (I’m a week late, I know).
Top: pot roast with fresh herbs and veggies.
Left: broccoli, ham egg and cheese frittata.
Right: white bean, kale and sausage stew.
Just trying to keep my head above water (pretty literally these days, we’re experiencing record rains after being in drought for 5 years). June 5 cannot get here soon enough.
Posted in challenges, choices, cooking, dealing with regain, eating, fighting biology, frustrated fat, post-op eating, post-op life, vsg, WLS
Tagged behavioral fatigue, being authentic, being real, challenges, cooking, failing but not a failure, fighting biology, fighting the fat girl, frustrated fat, I am NOT perfect, oh behave!, regain, self-care, shit is hard, sleeve gastrectomy, stress, VSG, vsg realness, WLS
Nearly as fast as I put on the weight I gained over the holidays, I lost it. Then regained it. Then lost it again. This rollercoaster ride my body’s taking me on is frustrating at most, but is what I suppose maintenance is at best. What I need to grapple with is this: am I ready to be here?
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Posted in challenges, cooking, fighting biology, frustrated fat, goals, la guerra, oh behave!, planning, post-op, post-op life, progreso, progress report, recipes, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, what's up doc?
Tagged being authentic, being average, bigger than my body, challenges, cooking, cooking is NOT hard, excess skin, fighting the fat girl, frustrated fat, goals, head trip, la guerra, love thyself, meal planning, oh behave!, post-op life, progreso, progress report, recipes, reflections, shit is hard, sleeve gastrectomy, stupid hormones, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, VSG, vsg realness, what's up doc?, WLS
This week saw a slight uptick in the scale, but I’m not worried about it. I ate a bit more salt yesterday than I normally do, and I also increased my carb intake this week to prep for yesterday’s race. I’m pretty sure that the glycogen I stored is binding some of the water I’m holding on to. Also, as one of my MFP friends pointed out, it’s possible that the workout I did yesterday caused my muscles to be holding on to some fluid as well. Regardless of what it was that caused the slight gain, this week I’m cutting back to my usual 50 grams or less of carbs, and keeping my protein intake high as usual.
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Posted in celebrations, challenges, cooking, daily bites, eating, exercise, goals, la guerra, oh behave!, post-op, success, support, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!
Tagged aspiring runner, benefits of wls, challenges, cooking, daily bites, eating, exercise, goals, la guerra, little celebrations, meal planning, NSV's, planning for success, post-op eating, post-op life, progreso, progress report, reflections, runner wannabe, she's got skillz, shit is hard, sleeve gastrectomy, sorry for sleeve rocking, success, the body is a funny thing, the little things, the sleeve, things of win and awesome, VSG, vsg realness, WLS, workin' on my fitness
No change this week. I suppose I should be grateful that there wasn’t a gain, but this doesn’t reduce my frustration level any. If anything, this week’s lack of forward progress frustrates me even more.
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Posted in challenges, frustrated fat, goals, head trips, la guerra, post-op, progreso, the body is a funny thing, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery
Tagged being authentic, being real, cooking, frustrated fat, goal setting, goals, head trips, la guerra, live in my shoes, numbers, post-op life, progreso, progress report, running to stand still, scale madness, shit is hard, VSG, vsg realness, weight loss goals, WLS, work that head game
This is how I chose to greet the new year, head cold and all:
And 2014 will be my year. Oh yes, yes it will be.
Tomorrow, I have my six-month follow up appointment at my surgeon’s office. Is it ridiculous that I’m mad that the high temps tomorrow are supposed to be in the 40s so I have to wear heavier clothes? I could wear what I wore last time I was at my surgeon’s office but it would mean I’d freeze my ass off as it is a summerweight maxi dress, and besides, it is too large for me now.
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Posted in big things, challenges, cooking, daily bites, eating, exercise, la guerra, oh behave!, post-op, recipes, reflections, success, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery, werk!
Tagged cooking, daily bites, determination, eating, follow up, la guerra, oh behave!, omg I eat carbs!, photo post, post-op eating, post-op life, recipes, reflections, sleeve gastrectomy, success, VSG, vsg realness, what's up doc?, WLS, workin' on my fitness
This bird is pretty much the best bird you will ever eat. For reals. And it’s easy to make.
My Christmas gift to you, my readers: a recipe!
I decided that for our Christmas meal, we would eat something high in protein and flavor. We’d already done turkey and beef tenderloin at Thanksgiving, so those were out. Fish didn’t seem Christmasy enough, and pork just doesn’t have enough protein bang for the calorie buck, so chicken it was. I decided to buy a roasting chicken (larger than your average bird at about 5-6 pounds instead of 2-3) so that we could eat on it the rest of the week, and have the carcass left over for me to make stock/soup out of later on.
This was seriously the best chicken I have ever made in my entire young life. It turned out so moist and flavorful that I am pretty sure I will not roast chicken any other way ever again. I mean, I’ll still make barbecue chicken legs, but this…for a whole bird? It’s a great way to make it.
The secret to the moist meat? The brine. Brining a chicken is one of the best ways to ensure that it stays moist through the roasting process. Since you’re roasting at a high temperature, the brine will help break down the muscle fibers in the meat, loosening them up so they trap water inside. This helps keep the meat moist despite the high cooking temperature.
So here’s how I did it.
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Posted in cooking, daily bites, eating, meal planning, planning, post-op, recipes, vsg, weight loss surgery
Tagged cooking, cooking is NOT hard, daily bites, eating, healthy eating, meal planning, post-op eating, post-op life, protein, recipes, VSG, vsg realness, WLS
As we are currently encased in ice, today was a snow day from school. I slept in, and have had a pretty leisurely day lounging about here at home. The roads are covered in ice, we can’t get out of our driveway, and it’s projected to be 16 degrees F tonight. More ice is coming tomorrow night, and we’re not getting above freezing until Monday afternoon. Fun times!
So I’ve cooked today and read a lot today. I really should be grading work, but my brain needed both the rest and the intellectual stimulation of reading things that were not student work.
I noticed something awesome today. For the first time in my adult life, when I look down, I can see my toes.
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Posted in celebrations, cooking, daily bites, eating, head trips, post-op, recipes, self-image, success, vsg, weight loss surgery
Tagged benefits of wls, cooking, cooking is NOT hard, daily bites, dr. nicholson, eating, head trip, healthy eating, little celebrations, NSVs, post-op eating, post-op life, recipes, self-image, sleeve gastrectomy, things of win and awesome, VSG, vsg realness, what's up doc?, WLS, work that head game
This week’s loss was a good one. I’m glad it wasn’t as big as the previous two weeks’ losses had been–I was actually getting worried about losing so much so fast! Of course, losing 20 pounds in 3 weeks is still pretty freakin’ fast.
This is the first picture in which you can see both knobs of the closet doors on either side of me in my front-facing picture. When I noticed this as I was putting together the composite, I got very excited. It means my shoulders are more narrow, that I’m losing inches around my upper arms, and that perhaps finally, the next time I fly on a plane, I’ll actually be much more comfortable, and so will anyone who has to sit next to me.
This week I learned some important lessons about my new stomach and eating that I’ll be using this week and every week as I go forward. This is Important Stuff if I am going to keep making forward progress. Continue reading →
Posted in challenges, cooking, daily bites, eating, goals, meal planning, post-op, progreso, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery
Tagged aspiring runner, cooking, daily bites, eating, fitness goals, goals, Jameson 5K, post-op eating, post-op life, progress report, recipes, sleeve gastrectomy, sorry for sleeve rocking, VSG, vsg realness, weight loss goals, WLS
This week’s loss was a surprise. Not that it happened, but the amount that was lost was a surprise. I didn’t walk as much as I would have liked to this week, but I did drink nearly a gallon of water each day (14 cups most days), I ate at or over 80 grams of protein daily, and was either at or under my calorie goal every day last week (900 calories). I am starting to see my belly finally flatten out, and when I look at myself in the mirror in the mornings as I’m getting out of the shower, I can see the contours of my shape finally becoming visible. One thing is certain: I need to begin weight training soon so that I don’t lose muscle mass and so I can tone up the musculature that I do have. Thankfully, when I put on muscle, I put it on crazy fast. My weekend schedule should be calming down pretty soon so that I can start to focus on strength training and hitting the gym for weight lifting sessions. I need to make an appointment to see one of the trainers there so I can re-learn how to use the machines and such since this gym we are members of now has different machines than the last gym we were at.
As of today, I’m 14.8 pounds away from my first major weight loss goal. I am 92 pounds away from my surgeon’s goal for me. I feel like I might reach his goal by my birthday, which is exciting and scary because it’s a weight I haven’t been as an adult. I have also lost 21.5% of my starting weight. This is also awesome.
For now, I’m going to keep hitting my protein and calorie goals and try to get in more walking this week. We are hitting the State Fair on Saturday, and dammit, I am going to try the Fried Thanksgiving Dinner! The way I see it, State Fair fare only gets eaten once a year, and we walk ALL OVER FAIR PARK when we go–I’m talking at least 5 miles last year alone. This year, we are planning on walking a lot more (because we CAN), and eating a lot less (because we CAN), so if I eat bits and bites of things like the Fried Thanksgiving Dinner, I’m not going to feel bad about it because I’m going to be walking my ass off all day long. And I am okay with this.
And here’s what I ate today. Good protein day: 82 grams. Continue reading →
Posted in cooking, daily bites, eating, post-op, progreso, the sleeve, vsg, weight loss surgery
Tagged cooking, daily bites, goals, little celebrations, photo post, post-op eating, post-op life, progress report, sorry for sleeve rocking, State Fair, surgeon's goal, VSG, vsg realness, WLS