Category Archives: expectations

One Year Follow Ups

I had a one-year follow up with my primary care doc on Tuesday, which turned out to be fabulous.  My labs came back beautifully:

cholesterolratiosMy fasting blood glucose was 81 and my a1c?  Completely normal.  Liver enzymes were back down to normal levels after having been high the first two months of this year.  My iron levels are great, and all my electrolytes are normal.  Blood pressure is fantastic and better yet–my doctor used a REGULAR SIZE CUFF to take it!  No extra large cuff this time!  She was thrilled that my health was vastly improved, and we started talking about mammograms and all that jazz…yep, it’s time for me to start doing those on the regular as now I am a lady of a certain age.  Since my gyno isn’t practicing any more, I got a recommendation for a new one (who ONLY does gynecology, no obstetrics–thank goodness) who I will be calling to see in the fall once school starts.  I have to figure out if she is on our new insurance that goes into effect September 1.  UGH INSURANCE.

That was the first doctor’s appointment of the week.  Today’s appointment was the bigger deal since it was with my surgeon, who I had not seen since last August when my husband had surgery with him.

I went in prepared.  Like any other ‘A’ student, I had a list of questions to ask.

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Post-Op Week 42 Progress Report

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This week’s progress: back on track.  I’m pleased with the loss of almost 2 pounds this week, given the fact that I fought hunger all week long.  Some of it was head hunger, some was stress-related, and some was just genuine hunger.  I am starting to wonder if I should eat more calories, but am hesitant to try going too far above 1000 daily.  I think I’m going to stick with what I’ve been doing for a couple more weeks and then reevaluate what I need then.  I’m getting better at listening to my body and figuring out what it needs.

Today’s weigh in also sees me crossing from “morbidly obese” to just “obese” per the BMI chart.  I know a lot of people don’t put a lot of stock in that thing, but when your doctor bases his goal weight for you on it, you pay attention to it.  Since my doctor’s goal weight places me squarely in the obese category, I revised my personal goal to place me at the upper end of overweight.  I know I will never have a “normal” BMI, and I’m okay with that.  Besides, if I did, I would look sick and not healthy.  I am aiming for looking healthy and feeling good about how I look.  I’m nearly there.  62.6 more pounds to go.

I can do this.

This week, I’m focusing on starting to get ready for my next 5k in July and just staying the course.  Trying not to let the stress of recent events (gallbladder ultrasound, stepmother’s passing, end of the school year, WORK) take its toll on my efforts, but these next few weeks, that’s going to be tough.  Just gotta remember not to eat the feels.

I’ll write more later…right now, it’s bedtime.

Being Different to Be Like Everyone Else

The other day at my therapist’s office, I was talking about this post I wrote, in which a polo shirt became a symbol of finally being just like everyone else.

Somehow the conversation turned to my upcoming trip to Kansas City to grade AP exams, being out of my element and having to learn to get some measure of control in an eating environment I have little control over with regard to food choice, portion size, and frequency of feeding.  I mentioned that I planned to take a small food scale and quarter-cup measuring cup in an attempt to better control what I ate each day.  I also mentioned I was a little uneasy about this because it would look odd to others.  Even though I’m now built differently than others on the inside, I want so much to look like everyone else on the outside, right down to my eating behaviors.  I want to fit in.  I want to be like everyone else.

But even though I’m looking more and more like everyone else, I’m still not the same as everyone else.

I’m missing 75% of my stomach.  I’m restricted by my anatomy from eating a full plate of food.  I leave food behind.  A LOT.  I count every protein and carb gram.  I take 2 multivitamins and 2 calcium supplements daily.  I take a magnesium supplement 3 times a week.  I take an iron supplement 4 times a week and a B12 supplement once a week.  I count every calorie that passes my lips.  I’m learning to run again after not being able to do it for 21 years.

I’m not just like everyone else.

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Post-Op Week 40 Progress Report: New Goals and A Tiny Pony

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This week’s progress was unexpectedly great.  I dropped a huge amount of weight, which I was not expecting to do given that I was retaining water all week long.  I skipped the gym this week, which happened because I wasn’t feelin’ it, and had a lot going on at work.  Instead, I did a lot of sitting on the balance ball while watching tv/working at my desk here at home.  Basically, if I was going to sit for more than 30 minutes, I made myself sit on the ball and try to stay on in an upright position.  It must have worked!  I am now only 13 pounds from my surgeon’s goal, which I am positive I can hit before school is out in June.  I am amazed that I am within striking distance of Dr. Nicholson’s expectation.  By the time my one-year follow-up appointment in July happens, I fully expect to have exceeded his expectation for my weight loss.

It should also be noted that in this picture, I am wearing smaller shorts and a smaller shirt.

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Post-Op Week 23 Progress Report and Less Than 100 To Goal!

Good loss this week. I think my losses are slowing down to a healthy 2-3 pounds a week as I approach the 6-months post-op mark.  I don’t care how long it takes me to get to my goal, just so long as I get there.

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Today marks another milestone: I now have less than 100 pounds to lose to get to my weight loss goal. I am less than 50 pounds from my surgeon’s goal.  It is weird to think that I could possibly be at MY goal by the summer.

And to be completely real with you, dear reader, I. Am. Terrified. Continue reading