Category Archives: daily bites

10

Tonight I ran for 10 minutes on the treadmill.  Now, they weren’t 10 continuous minutes, but it was 10 minutes nonetheless.

10 months ago, I couldn’t have walked 10 minutes continuously without getting winded.

In 10 days, I turn 41.

When I turned 40, I couldn’t run at all.

In fact, there were a lot of things I couldn’t do when I turned 40 that I can do now. Running is one of them.

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Identity Crisis

At what point does your weight start defining you?

At what point does your weight stop defining you?

This week in therapy, I talked about how I felt as though I never let my weight define me in the first place.

My family did that for me.

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Monday Musings: 3.5 mph, Sleep, Perchance to Dream

is how fast I ran on the treadmill tonight.

Mind you, I only ran for a little over 5 minutes of my 22 minutes on the damned thing, but I ran.  And they weren’t 5 continuous minutes of running–I walk really fast, and alternate a few minutes of walking really fast with a minute or so of running.   Tonight, I ran faster than I’ve been able to, which is an accomplishment for this running newbie.  I need to work on duration rather than speed, though.  It’s hard not to want to run fast when this comes on my playlist, though:

When I listen to it, my pace is slow and then builds up.  I’d eventually like to be able to run for the duration of the entire song.  I got halfway through my playlist, about a mile in, and then I quit.  I rode the bike for the next 30 minutes of my workout.

I would have run more had I not been exhausted.

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FATigue

Behavioral fatigue, I has it.

Behavioral fatigue is the official term for that time when you get tired of implementing a behavior so you start to slack off a little because you think, “Oh, but I’ve been doing this for so long and I’m just tired of it.”

But in all reality, it hasn’t been all that long.  It’s only been 8 months (including the time when I began the pre-op diet).

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#fatgirlslimproblems

First, I apologize for the sporadic posting this week.  Spring semester is always busy for me, so my posts may start becoming more and more spread out as we inch closer to the end of the school year.

#fatgirlslimproblem 1:  Work is burying me right now, and I’ve taken on extra work outside of school to make ends meet.  This post-op life is costing so much more than I imagined it would:  therapy costs, doctors’ visits, labs, clothing…all of it is more than I can handle financially.  And as my salary hasn’t increased to keep up with the cost of living much less the costs of all the stuff previously mentioned, working a second and third job is what is needed.  My flexible spending money is gone–I blew through all $2000 of it by January 1 (our plan year starts September 1), so this plan year has been a very expensive one.  While my insurance premium cost dropped, my deductible doubled (from $1200 to $2400) as did my out of pocket max (from $2400 to $4800), so my healthcare costs have been much, much higher than they were last year.

What really sucks?  We don’t have benefits election until AUGUST this year.   Why?  Because TRS can’t figure out what they want the insurance rates to be.  So now I won’t be able to appropriately figure out how much to set aside for health care costs for next year.  Bastards.

So when does our plan year start over again?  SEPTEMBER 1.

Thanks, BCBSTX TRS-ActiveCare, you suck.  I’ll continue working 3 jobs just to pay for health care.  UGH.

#fatgirlslimproblem 2:  Today this happened. Continue reading

Just As I Suspected

These days, when a conversation begins with “You are looking good,” I never expect it to be followed by “Everyone was talking about you yesterday!”

But I suppose that when folks don’t see you in a while and you’ve lost nearly 150 pounds, it shouldn’t be a surprise.

This is also why a school is the worst place to keep anything on the down low.
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“I Didn’t Recognize You!”

was a phrase I heard a lot today.
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Post-Op Week 32 Progress Report

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This was a great week on the weight loss front.  Did not see the size of this loss coming, that’s for sure!

But I’ll take it.

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My Mindful Valentine

Valentine’s Day is a day that for most folks is filled with sweet treats, flowers, and declarations of love.  Some folks feel like the day is simply a conspiracy by the candy and greeting card companies to get people to buy stuff in an attempt to woo or keep a lover.  Today, Valentine’s Day for me was just another Friday–nothing out of the ordinary, really.  My Valentine’s Day went down a little like this:

  • Got to school this morning to discover my classroom door’s window covered in Valentines.
  • One of my students gave me a Valentine that said, “Yoda one for me” with a picture of Yoda on it.
  • Came home to a handmade book by my hubby detailing some of the reasons he loves me.  It made me cry.
  • Went to dinner and had a tasty fish dish that I am going to source the ingredients for this weekend so I can replicate it here at home.
  • Registered myself for the Firefly Run on March 29.  I don’t care if I walk the whole way; I am going to finish, no matter how long it takes me.
  • Spent some quality time on the treadmill and bike at the gym even though I wasn’t feelin’ it.

I don’t need a contrived holiday to tell my husband that I love him.  I do this every day, as it should be.  I couldn’t be more blessed to have him along for this adventure we call a life together.  I’m mindful every day of the fact that I am lucky to call him my husband, and that this life we share together is one of the most precious gifts I have.

So for me, today was really all about mindfulness in many ways.

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Dogpaddling In The Deep End

is how I feel as of late.

There is simply so much going on in my life both at work and at home, and I’m trying to juggle both of those worlds while trying to keep myself afloat and it’s hard.

I got a call from my PCP’s office today.  She wants to discuss my recent bloodwork with me.  Why do I get the feeling that my liver enzymes were high again?  I mean, that’s the reason I had to go back to have the test redone in the first place.

This means I will have to go in for an ultrasound on my gallbladder to make sure there aren’t any stones.  She said she’d be obligated to send me for one.

SHIT.

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