Tuesday’s Little Things

I kind of failed at snapping photos of my meals today, but here is what I did manage to snap:

Today's food choices, from upper right:  multivitamin and calcium supplement x2; 40 cloves of garlic turkey breast x2 (I ate it for lunch and dinner); Sargento reduced fat cheese stick; sugar-free Blue Bell popsicle; turkey sausage, broccoli and cheese mini frittatas.

Today’s food choices, from upper right: multivitamin and calcium supplement x2; 40 cloves of garlic turkey breast x2 (I ate it for lunch and dinner); Sargento reduced fat cheese stick; sugar-free Blue Bell popsicle; turkey sausage, broccoli and cheese mini frittatas.  I didn’t get a picture of the crockpot chicken fajitas (FAIL) or the strawberry I ate.  And yes, it was A strawberry.  A very large one.

I have a few things to celebrate today:

1.  I rocked a fabulous outfit today:


Dress: Lucky Brand. Shrug: Talbots Woman. Necklace: CJ Banks. Flip flops: Clarks. Smile: Tired, because this was taken after I got home today.

2.  I squeezed in a 15 minute walk during my planning period at school today.  I felt pretty good after I did it, so I’ll be repeating that behavior for sure as long as I can, even if I have to do it after school when I’m at my most tired.

3.  I am starting to see what shape I am under all my fleshiness.  It simultaneously freaks me out and makes me happy.  I don’t know what I’m supposed to look like because I’ve only seen myself as fat my entire life.  This is a little unsettling because I’m not accustomed to what I see when I look in the mirror every week and notice that some feature of my body has changed.  I haven’t seen myself this small as an adult so I am struggling internally with what I see.  It’s almost like I’m trying to see myself as I always have–at twice what I should weigh–and being distressed that I’m not seeing the only physical me I have ever known.  I know this is something I am going to have to work on for the rest of my life.

4.  I successfully fought the urge to pick up unhealthy snacks on the way home this evening.  I knew I’d be eating dinner the minute I walked in the door, but my drive home every day is like running a gantlet of fast food joints–I drive by no fewer than 6 places on my way home:  Sonic, Taco Bueno, Subway, McDonald’s, Wendy’s, and Arby’s–and never mind the RaceTrac and 7-11!–all of whom have a siren song of convenient, crappy food playing loudly as you pass by.  As I passed the Sonic (where I actually do go to get a Route 44 unsweet tea on occasion), I thought, “Hey a cheese stick would be good” and then I mentally slapped myself.  No, it wouldn’t be.  First of all, it’s fried.  Fried foods are verboten on my doctor’s plan.  Second, really, self?  Shit like that is what got you where you were before surgery!  I kept driving as I kept fighting the urge.  I felt like I was in the clear once I passed the tennis complex that’s up the street on the west side of the Sonic.  Unfortunately, right now I think the reason I’m wanting these unhealthy things is that my hormones are running amok as it’s nearly time for Ma Nature’s monthly visit, and this is something I used to do pre-surgery about that same time.  Time to relearn a new behavior to associate with this time of the month, I suppose.

In short, it was a pretty good day.  Tomorrow will be good too.  I’ve got my breakfast made, lunch and snacks ready to grab and pack in my lunch box, cup for water ready to be filled up and vitamin chewable and calcium supplements ready to roll.

And now…time for sleep.  This has been a long week, and it’s only Tuesday!

6 responses to “Tuesday’s Little Things

  1. You are doing lots of work – physically, mentally and emotionally. Go, you!!! I LOVE, love, love the dress. And again, your hourglass figure it showing through – you are hot stuff, baby!

    • And it is work! SO MUCH WORK. But like I told my surgeon, I’m not afraid of hard work. But to do it all at once…! It’s a lot. I am thankful that I have a couple of great therapists to help me work through all the stuff I’m experiencing.

  2. Wonderful post!! Maybe take a string cheese stick for your drive home? I really enjoy your posts, and yes, you did rock your outfit!!

    • Normally, I try to eat a snack before I leave school. And I did that yesterday but my problem yesterday was that I didn’t go straight home–I ran errands first and I was thirsty and didn’t have any water with me. When I get overwhelmingly hungry like that, I generally will suck down a big glass of water and that quells the beast. But since I didn’t have any water with me, I couldn’t do that, so the smell of ANY food was really tempting. 😦

      Glad you enjoy the posts! I really like writing them. It helps me gather my thoughts in an attempt to process them and to try and understand why I behave/behaved like I do/did.

  3. I love the caption ” the strawberry I ate. And yes, it was A strawberry. A very large one.” It’s amazing how satisfying one strawberry can be if you really take the time to pay attention to eating it, isn’t it? I was also reminded of this exact same thing when watching Colonial House and they got some strawberries … one person commented on how before, in the real world, they’d wolf down a bowl of them but in the colonial village, where they hadn’t seen fresh fruit for weeks, suddenly one or two strawberries was manna from heaven!

    • The sad thing was that the strawberry wasn’t even very good! It was really mushy and gross. 😦 I was slightly disappointed in my snack choice. I think next time I’ll just eat the applesauce I have waiting for me in the fridge at work!

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